Day 2

It's time to blog..

It's becoming a habit for me to blog at night.

Today i wanna say..

I MISS HIM.

I was very down last night.

Even when he called.

Though i forced myself to talk.

He somehow realized that i was very down.

This morning when i woke up..

I couldn't stop thinking.

Why am i feeling so down?

Why do i miss him so much?

If i emo, will it make any changes to the fact that we are apart?

Then i made up my mind to try to cheer up.

To occupy my time.

Don't keep thinking about him.

Though it's still very hard for me.

But then i think i did well.

I gave him a morning smile and when he called, i can hear that he is much cheerful..

i feel happy to hear him being happy..

I guess that's all i need. :)

Though i miss him a lot and i thought of him a lot.

I did not call or msg as much as day 1.

hehehe :)

Watched a lot of videos online and also dramas in the TV.
So much that by night time, i am sick of dramas already.

Went out yc with ah ku and bern at night.

See the similarities in all the pictures?

We all wear specs.
Daddy purposely put on his "lou fa" specs to match us all :P

I saw a quote on facebook.

And i totally agree with it. 

"When you love someone, you don't have to make them love u as much as u do..

But love them so much that they don't want to be loved by anyone except you"

I will love him with all my heart.

I'll just do my best.

原来爱情这么简单,

只要你快乐，我就满意了.

我好想你.

Day 1

Without you.

One word to explain all.

L.I.F.E.L.E.S.S

Woke up around 10am.

With no where to go, nothing to eat, nothing to do.

Not like usual..

Today i stayed in the room until 12pm..

Before i went to take a bath and waited for daddy to buy me lunch.

In the afternoon, brought wei to the dentist.

An appointment was made at 3.45pm.

We arrived at 3.30pm.

But waited till 4.15pm before it finally reaches her turn.

Malaysia's government service is always like that.

Why make appointment at a specific time when you still have to wait like 30 mins for it to reach your turn?

It's so stupid.

That is why there is zero efficiency in the government services.

The whole check up and treatment thing is just 15 mins.

Imagine if everything is done on time, it would have save all of us so much time.

-.-

Walked over to mummy's office to get the car.

And drove home.

Second time driving since i am back..

Starting to get the hang of it.

No more nervous feeling :P

Feel so proud XD

I miss him.

I felt like calling him every once a while.

But that would be rather annoying cos imagine ur phone rings like every one or two hours.

So i didn't called so often.

Baby is super boring in KL.

Hope he can find things to occupy his time.

Or not boring-ness can really make you feel down.

I've been trying to get myself to do stuffs too.

Being emo will only make baby feel emo too.

Just realized i put a lot of priority on him.

Time to bring some back to myself.

I hope you miss me too.

Muahxx. 

A Very Touching Story

When I saw a cashier hand this little boy his money back, the boy couldn't have been more than 5 or 6 years old. 

The cashier said, 'I'm sorry, but you don't have enough money to buy this doll.'' 

The little boy turned to the old woman next to him, ''Granny, are you sure I don't have enough money?'' 

She replied, ''You know that you don't have enough money to buy this doll, my dear.'' 

Then she asked him to stay there for just five minutes while she went to look around.

She left quickly. 

The little boy was still holding the doll in his hand. 

Finally, I walked toward him and I asked him who he wished to give this doll to.

'It's the doll that my sister loved most and wanted so much for Christmas. 

She was sure that Santa Claus would bring it to her.'

 I replied to him that maybe Santa Claus would bring it to her after all, and not to worry. 

But he replied to me sadly. 

'No, Santa Claus can't bring it to her where she is now. 

I have to give the doll to my mommy so that she can give it to my sister when she goes there.' 

His eyes were so sad while saying this, 'My Sister has gone to be with God. 

Daddy says that Mommy is going to see God very soon too so I thought that she could take the doll with her to give it to my sister.'' 

My heart nearly stopped. 

The little boy looked up at me and said, 'I told daddy to tell mommy not to go yet. I need her to wait until I come back from the mall.' 

Then he showed me a very nice photo of himself. 

He was laughing. 

He then told me 'I want mommy to take my picture with her so she won't forget me.' 

'I love my mommy and I wish she didn't have to leave me, but daddy says that she has to go to be with my little sister.' 

Then he looked again at the doll with sad eyes, very quietly. 

I quickly reached for my wallet and said to the boy. 

'Suppose we check again, just in case you do have enough money for the doll!'' 

OK' he said, 'I hope I do have enough.' 

I added some of my money to his without him seeing and we started to count it. 

There was enough for the doll and even some spare money. 

The little boy said, 'Thank you God for giving me enough money!' 

Then he looked at me and added, 'I asked last night before I went to sleep for God to make sure I had enough money to buy this doll, so that mommy could give it to my sister. He heard me!'' 

'I also wanted to have enough money to buy a white rose for my mommy, but I didn't dare to ask God for too much. But He gave me enough to buy the doll and a white rose.'' 

'My mommy loves white roses.' 

A few minutes later, the old lady returned and I left with my basket. 

I finished my shopping in a totally different state of mind from when I started. 

I couldn't get the little boy out of my mind. 

Then I remembered a local newspaper article two days ago, which mentioned a drunk man in a truck, who hit a car occupied by a young woman and a little girl. 

The little girl died right away and the mother was left in a critical state. 

The family had to decide whether to pull the plug on the life-sustaining machine because the young woman would not be able to recover from the coma. 

Was this the family of the little boy? 

Two days after this encounter with the little boy I read in the newspaper that the young woman had passed away. 

I couldn't stop myself as I bought a bunch of white roses and I went to the funeral home where the body of the young woman was for people to see and make last wishes before her burial. 

She was there, in her coffin, holding a beautiful white rose in her hand with the photo of the little boy and the doll placed over her chest. 

I left the place, teary-eyed, feeling that my life had been changed forever. 

The love that the little boy had for his mother and his sister is still, to this day, hard to imagine, and in a fraction of a second, a drunk driver had taken all this away from him.

His last day in Kuantan.

Baby's last day in Kuantan.

Going to KL for his internship tomorrow.

Had breakfast with him in the morning.

Then we went to the bank to open a new account..

Went back to baby's house to set up the online banking.

Went back to the bank because the officer forgot to set up the mobile request for TAC.

Then we went for a hair cut :)

Baby and I went to cut our long hair.

The aunty say we look like secondary school students.

Hehehe :P

Baby asked the aunty to cut a style that he can look neat when he goes to work.

But the aunty say he has a kid face.

Hahaha XD

cut how also look like boy boy only. :P

Baby finally brought me to Tutti Frutti :)

Expensive lor i feel. >.<
But still I like it.

Cos it's like yogurt with ice in it :P

I am a huge fan of yogurt somemore..

Melt to the taste of Mango, Passion fruit and Vanilla :P

Every Tuesday is Ladies day..
so ladies will have 15% discount :)

Baby went home to clean himself before we went to Tunas Manja Beserah to do some groceries shopping 

Baby wanted to buy some food back to KL.

But there is really nothing much that you can eat, if you dun wanna cook.

Thinking of what baby will eat in KL makes me so worried.

When i go KL, I must cook nice nice food for baby :)

Better start practicing since i will always be at home now.

At night, after dinner..

Dragged wei to accompany me to ECM.

Wanted to buy something for baby.

Since guys like practical stuffs.

I bought him a formal shirt.

Since he will need it. 

So i went to buy it in Padini..

First time driving after a few months..

Gan Jeong o...

Omg..

But everything was fine. :P

Not bad eh.. 

Hope baby will like the pressie i bought for him :)

Monday

It's Monday..

Spend my whole day with baby again.

We had breakfast together.

Went home to rest awhile because both of us did not have enough sleep the day before.

Then we went to Mega to get his phone fixed.

But there was some complications. >.<

We went to watch Johnny English in the afternoon.

Not up to my expectations but still it was very hilarious.

Laughed so hard..

Baby laughed a lot too..

Watching him laugh makes me feel so happy.. :)

Then baby sent me home so that we can rest and have dinner before our next movie with my family.

Nasi Lemak.

Treated my whole family to this movie.

This movie is rather disappointing.

Saw many comments that say nasi lemak is very nice.

But i felt that it's not so nice only..

It's true that a lot of the scene was shown as a sarcasm to the government.

But in the middle, it was kinda boring.. 

Wei said mummy felt asleep.

*smack head*

Then went home separately..

Baby went on his own, i went home with daddy and mummy..

So this is how i spend my Monday.

Baby, I MISS U.

Goodnight.

Mix Feelings

I am finally home.

I have mix feelings for this holiday..

I am glad to be home.

But this holiday also meant that baby and i will have to separate for 3 months.

I feel more towards the sadness..

Because i have been so dependent, so near to him.

I see him almost everyday of one and a half year.

I had never been away from baby more than one week i think.

Now that i have to be away from him for 3 months. 

So long lor..

Even thinking of it makes me sad.

This semester break, baby won't be here to accompany me..

When i go back to kampar, baby won't be there for me.

For 4 semester, almost every day i had at least one meal with baby..

Now i will have to eat myself..

When i need hugs, baby is just 30 houses away..

When i need him, he will be there in just a few minutes..

But now, we are few hundred km away..

I am so not used to it..

But i know, life is always changing.

We change to strive for a better future.

So, i must be strong.

I have to learn to adapt to whatever situation that is given to me.

Because when i am strong, baby won't be so worried about me.

Hahaha..

This is funny to me..

Somehow, i feel like next sem is my first time going to Uni..

I never felt this way during my first year first sem.

I never really had home sick problem because i wasn't alone.

I had him with me all the time.

Now that i have no one so dependable.

I am all alone.

My lifestyle in Kampar have to change.

No more eating with baby..

No more spending time at his house..

No more putting him as priority number 1 in every decision i make in kampar.

OMG..

I feel so uncomfortable with changes...

I had this feeling when i entered baby's condo..

I had this feeling when we cooked our dinner together..

I had this feeling when we watched TV lying on the couch..

I had this feeling when you helped me out with some chores..

I had this feeling, baby.. 

I love you so much, baby.

No words can represent how i feel.

Nothing can express this feeling that i had.

But i just want you to know. 

I love you.

With all my heart.

For you, i will be strong and adapt to these changes.

Muahxx.

I know what i want.

I saw my future.

And you're in it :)

Two days One Night in KL

KL time.

After baby came back from his last paper, we packed and left Kampar for KL.

Baby's luggage super a lot.

The boot is full.
*i dunno how to spell that*

The back seat is also full..

Aiks...

So we drove slowly and reach around 4 plus..

Unloaded the stuffs from the car..

Both of us walk 3 times up and down..
*up twice down once*

While baby went another round himself to bring the last laundry bag.

Help baby unpacked and rested..

 
Cooked dinner :)
First time cooking in baby's condo..

Hehehe..
we don't have tomato sauce so we went down to the convenience store to buy tomato sauce.

we ended up buying ice-cream too :P

Felt so much like a kid..

Buying ice-cream when mummy ask you to buy something else.. 

Hehehehe..

Baby helped me out with the spaghetti.. 

 

 

At night we watch Running Man while lying comfortably on the sofas :)
So relaxing and enjoying.
Hehe..
Slept at 1.30am.. 

Last day of Exam

Last day of exam had passed.

Last paper is HRM. :)

Human Resource Management.

I was glad that this paper is over.

Luckily, the scope of tips was accurate..

So after the exam, went home and started to pack a little here and there.

At night, i had dinner with Jacky, Ah Lian, Ah Rui, Estee and Ah Boon..

We had so much fun talking..

Laughing so much thanks to Estee and Ah Rui..

It's been so long since i chat with them like this.

I miss those moment.

Went home to continue packing..
Well of course before dinner, I already finish packing mine.

But baby's things...

SO MUCH.

Cannot finish packing in a short period of time.

Was hungry by 12am :P

So i took the initiative for the first time.

To ask them out for yc.

It's something very special because they all know i don't go out at night.

What more is eating supper.

Hehehe..

So everyone came out for supper :P

And of course we had another round of laughter..

Went back home and continue packing after that..

Welcome, Miss Holiday!!
My holidays is finally here.

Leaving on a Jet Plane

Was asleep 30 mins ago..

Woke up all of a sudden..

Something is running in my head.

Some issues that just won't leave me alone. 

 I think this is me when i have to leave my comfort zone.

Thinking a lot.

Worrying a lot.

Sigh

I got to learn how to adapt to any situation.

Or else i have to face with this insecure, uncertainties and worrisome feeling.

Currently in love with this song.

Leaving on a Jet Plane.

By John Denver

 

All my bags are packed I'm ready to go
I'm standing here outside your door
I hate to wake you up to say goodbye.
But the dawn is breaking it's early morning
The taxi is waiting, he is blowing his horn
Already I'm so lonesome, I could cry

So kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that you wait for me

Hold me like you never let me go

I'm leaving on a jetplane,

I don't know when I'll be back again
Oh babe I hate to go

There is so many times I've let you down
So many times I've played around
I tell you now they don't mean a thing.
Every place I go I think of you
Every song I sing I sing for you.
When I come back I wear your wedding-ring


So kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that you wait for me

Hold me like you never let me go

I'm leaving on a jetplane,

I don't know when I'll be back again
Oh babe I hate to go


Now the time has come to leave you
One more time let me kiss you
Close your eyes, and I'll be on my way
Dream about the days to come 

I wont have to leave alone, about the times I wont have to say:


So kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that you wait for me

Hold me like you never let me go

I'm leaving on a jetplane,I don't know when I'll be back again.
I'm leaving on a jetplane,I don't know when I'll be back again.
I'm leaving on a jetplane,I don't know when I'll be back again.

Oh babe I hate to go. 

I love wearing your jacket because it has your smell.

It feels like you're hugging me, baby.

I love you. 

1000th day

Our 1000th day.

I don't know if being together with your partner for 1000 days meant anything to you.

But it meant a lot to me.

Because to reach your first 1000 days is not a short period of time.

Neither is it easy.

That is why i appreciate a lot when these days come.

So sad that on my 1000th day, i have to sit for exam.

Came back from exam feeling moody..

Because it's the 1000th day and i have to go sit for exam.

Walked up the stairs so slowly..

Baby ran up as usually. 

He always run up to his room very quickly..

Then stick his butt onto the computer chair..

So i take my own sweet moody time to drag my leg up the stairs..

 Went into the room, put my bags on the chair..

Pouted a little.. then went to drop my body on the bed.

Then i saw something huge in my place with the pillows..

looked up and saw a GIANT teddy..

With a card..

Then i realized is a present baby bought for me for this 1000th day :)

Feel so happy that it didn't pass as an ordinary day after all.

Didn't expect anything from baby actually..

His level of romance had decreased dramatically :P

Hehehe.. 

But still it touches my heart that he did something for me ^^

I love you baby..

I know you have many other things to take care of.

New experience and a new chapter of your life will begin very soon.

thank you for the surprise.

It means a lot to me.

It's the thoughts that counts, baby.. 

I just want our journey together to be filled with happiness and joy.

I love you, baby..

Muahx. ♥♥

This semester, i totally had no mood for exam.

Now that i left only one paper, i also have no desire to celebrate my holiday.

Because this holiday, i will be alone..

No friends left in Kuantan.

Everyone went back to uni already.

Even baby is not going to be in Kuantan. :(

His internship starts on the 3rd of October.

Sigh..

This will be a lonely holiday..

Feel so sad even thinking about it.

Sigh

I'm starting to miss baby already.

 

By the way, her name is Princess :)

Strong Woman

Was feeling emo for two days already.

I knew it all along why i was emo.

Then i thought i was over it.

Because i feel maybe it's my problem.

My perception and others point of view that i cannot accept.

Then i found out, there is another thing.

I realized that i care so much about it.

It's not the actions, but the efforts.

The value, the courtesy of you.

Have you ever felt that your heart was squeezed so tightly it hurts?

These kind of uncomfortableness was with me for the past two days.

I overcome my emo-ness very quickly alone.

But when i see you again, it came squeezing my heart again.

 i could not help it. 

Sorry for being so emotionless and uncaring.

Acting as if i don't care is less painful for me.

I tried to care, but i feel so painful inside that tears would automatically form.

Acting like you don't care when you actually do, hurts too.

I wonder what won't hurt?

I guess that is when you truly don't care anymore.

 I realized that every relationship no matter with who has it's ups and downs.

As long as when you're down, do not give up and try to tolerate, it will go up again.

I'm sorry i am not able to be with you in this birthday celebration.

I cannot be the first one to wish you face to face..

So, I shall wish you here first.

 

Happy be-earlied birthday, my precious one.

I love you.

Listening to this song on Creamy's playlist is so calming and soothing..

Feel so relax listening to this song. :)

Waiting for her to give me the song title so that i can download.. :)

Behind a strong woman smile is a million tears that you will never see....

 

STATS to my disappointment

Today was the second paper of my finals.

STATISTICAL TECHNIQUES FOR BEHAVIORAL SCIENCE II

Had been doing loads of practice for this paper.

I think the most effort i put in my finals is for this paper.

But at 11am this morning.

This paper is my disappointment.

Could not get to score for the 40 marks.

There goes the A that i aimed to score.

My aim was super high for this paper.

That is why i was very super disappointed i could not get to do well in it.

Problem is, i do not know which part of the calculation i did wrong.

Formulas correct, numbers correct.

But I just could not get the right calculation.

Double checked, triple checked, check for almost 10 times..

I still cannot get it right.

ANOVA is not supposed to have negative value!!!
Why the hell my result is negative?

I just don't get it.

Don't plan to re-do it at home because it's over..

Somehow, i should be focusing on the other papers.

But i spend the whole day mourning.

Felt a lot better later in the afternoon..

Maybe i won't fail.

But i don't think i can get A lor..

Sigh..

Whatever it is..

I have to say one thing..

GOODBYE STATS..

I hope i don't have to see you again. 

First Day of Finals

Today is the first day of my Finals.

Today's paper is MORAL.

Didn't really studied it because it's so boring..

And darling kept telling me, it is so easy.. 

So okie lor..
My laziness took charge and gave in to his words.

So i studied something else.

Moral paper was okay lar..

I would not say i know how to do.

But I guessed quite a lot.

Just hoping to pass only.

Went to have a look at my moral coursework marks.

I heard it is over 40.

But darling said, during his time, it was over 50..

Hmm..

Scheme changed?

Anyhow.. My coursework marks is 31.6 :)

Weeeee..

Not bad eh? :P

Should be able to pass kua.. 

Took the bus home with Yiwen..

Really dunno how i am going to survive the next sem on my own.

Went up the bus without confirming where it would go.

Ended up in the wrong bus which caused me and yiwen to walk a long way before reaching home.

As if walking a long way is not bad enough, I forgot to bring my keys out. >.<

Usually baby will always be with me or he will pick me up.

I dun even have to remember to bring my keys out.

But baby was in class..
I have no key to enter the house. :(

Waited one hour outside.

Tired, sleepy and hungry..

Poor me..

Next semester without baby here, i wonder how i would survived.

Too dependent to baby liao.
aiks..

Blogging

I miss blogging..

Reading blogs made me wanna blog.

Hahaha..

Had been spending my everyday doing nothing in Kampar..

Need to study but i just can't get the motivation.

I wonder how i am going to take exam this semester.

*sigh*

Had been thinking a lot about things that should not be a problem.

I know i am strong enough to be independent.

Somehow, i just don't want to?

Hehehe..

Too used to being pampered.

I guess i just don't want to experience not being treated as princess. :P

Anyways..

I have to start my study engine on.

Or else, i would surely regret for not doing my best.

GOOD LUCK to my coursemates who will be having their finals.

Good luck to my dearest birthday gang for your new semester.

Wish i could spend more time with you guys.

Seen and read so much about your trips.

It's just so sad that i could not join them. 

MISS YOU GUYS ♥